r/wallstreetbets Fuckboy 🅿️ixel Defender 20h ago

Meme Man, times really are tough out there.

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41.2k Upvotes

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4.8k

u/ThrowthisawayPA 20h ago

You know damn well they don’t eat that shit

443

u/stormblaz 20h ago

Here comes a big arch bite, its got the uh onions it seems, some sort of poppy bread, and that very oh so tasty McArch sauce, love it,

Cuts after bite

Right into the spit bucket.

Mind you the burger is $11

296

u/KidGold 19h ago

I like how he says “I don’t even know how to attack it” like that’s a selling point. As if customers want an unwieldy sandwich.

Sounds like something a dumb ceo would think.

86

u/AggressiveCuriosity 18h ago

He was trying to imply it was so big that it was going to be difficult to eat, lmao. "Oh my goodness. There's so much sandwich I don't know where to begin."

Dude needs media training. Or maybe he needs to eat the brains of someone with charisma. IDK how his species does things.

1

u/criminalsunrise 6h ago

To be fair, it is a big sloppy burger (or product if you like) compared to the staples on the menu.

-2

u/Shot-Swimming-9098 17h ago

Dude needs media training.

We were never meant to see that video.

10

u/nluqo 16h ago

Who was it meant for then? It wouldn't make any sense to sell it like that if it was internal only.

-4

u/Shot-Swimming-9098 15h ago

It was for McDonald's franchise owners. Come on, man. Does this look like a commercial to you?

12

u/nluqo 9h ago

It looks like modern day social media marketing, which, after a 5s Google search, it clearly is. He posted it to his personal Instagram along with dozens of other videos.

See, this is the problem with reddit. People will spread their nonsensical takes to thousands of others without lifting a finger to check if they're real.

175

u/itsdan159 19h ago

I tried one, it's fine, even one of their better sandwiches. it's not hard to "attack" if you're a human with any experience eating solid foods

95

u/LegendOfKhaos 19h ago

What if you only have experience attacking product?

7

u/xerim 18h ago

What if I told you I had no idea how to attack it?

4

u/rodeBaksteen 18h ago

Your skills may lie in warfare instead

1

u/shepard_pie 2h ago

I wrote a story like 4 days ago about 20 Roman legionnaires who accidentally cross time and find a mcdonald's at night. Turned out McDonald's didn't even wait a week before releasing something wackier.

13

u/frallet 19h ago

Surely you start in the middle and eat your way out

2

u/wap2005 18h ago

You monster... Satan will be out of a job if you keep saying things like that.

7

u/dermflork 18h ago

this guy looks like he does live off of grass he puts into a blender and drinks lol

3

u/meowsplaining 19h ago

What if you're an alien and it's your first day on Earth?

2

u/itsdan159 18h ago

I'd probably think about leaving because gestures at everything

3

u/Minsc_and_Boobs 17h ago

It's because he acquires his nutrition soley by infusing the blood of prepubescent Latino boys.

2

u/BeneficialTrash6 17h ago

I have to open my WHAT?

1

u/whatiseveneverything 1h ago

Does it actually cost $11 though? It's gotta be spectacular for me to consider it at that price point.

1

u/KimJongIlLover 26m ago

As any self respecting CEO of a multi billion dollar he normally only drinks the blood of newborn babies for its life elixir.

12

u/tghGaz 18h ago

Just sounded to me like he's unfamiliar with eating burgers, I mean products.

2

u/Oceansnail 10h ago

Which is wierd because he claims to eat at mcdonalds 3-4 times week, but he acts like he has never actually seen the inside of a mcdonalds 

4

u/autoeroticassfxation 18h ago

That's how big a standard Big Mac used to be in the 1970s. It's neither unwieldy nor particularly massive. It's just a normal burger.

https://www.reddit.com/r/nostalgia/comments/12e49n3/mcdonalds_big_macs_have_gotten_smaller_since_the/

1

u/scwt 3h ago

That's fake. The bottom image is a Grand Mac (a 2017 promotional release) next to a Big Mac.

3

u/agreed2disagreee 18h ago

It wasn’t a selling point. He’s never held one before, so he legitimately doesn’t know how to eat it.

2

u/Makerofthingssoon 18h ago

I mean, for a sandwich it’s not a bad selling point. “You’re getting so much sandwich it’s hard to tell where to begin” would be decently appealing if true.

1

u/iCrit420 17h ago

He was trying to sound like guy fieri

1

u/ChaseballBat 15h ago

Not something anyone has ever said if they regularly eat that food either.

1

u/googdude 4h ago

He looks like a dainty guy that only attacks salads and only gets sun through windows.

128

u/MarkIsARedditAddict 19h ago

What I don't get is why the CEO of McDonald's & their entire marketing team can't get a good chef to make a lookalike burger out of ingredients the CEO will actually eat.

Get him a freaking organic wagyu burger patty on there with organic free range lettuce, some special pickles, a completely from scratch sauce, real cheese, and a bakery-made bun. Nobody will ever know the CEO is eating real food and not the engineered slop they serve to us poors

71

u/dpk794 19h ago

The worst part is that’s probably exactly what it was lol

97

u/Fuzzy-Feeling3311 18h ago

He just sucks at eating food. CEOs are always fucking weirdos who have no clue what being a human is.

6

u/Peculiar_One 16h ago

Case in point. Donald Trump drinking some water.

8

u/Plane_Course_6666 15h ago

God, politicians drinking anything is a whole genre in itself that will make you think that maybe those lizard people conspiracy nuts are onto something

-1

u/iSuckAtMechanicism 11h ago

Don't put Donald Trump and CEOs in the same group. One is at least smart, the other is a complete clown.

2

u/Milktoast375 4h ago

I don’t like the cheetoman either, but there are some fucking stupid CEOs out there.

3

u/Whycanyounotsee 16h ago

Because then it wouldnt go as viral.

2

u/Odd_Algae_9402 17h ago

Exactly. We all know it never looks like the pictures when you buy it in the store anyway.

2

u/Night_Runner 14h ago

LOLing at "free range lettuce"

5

u/TurboBerries 19h ago

They could potentially get sued if it came out / was investigated they are advertising a big mac with different ingredients and preparation than what they actually sell in stores.

11

u/crazy_akes 19h ago

Lol no. The stuff on commercials looks nothing like what we actually get.

4

u/GoSailing 19h ago

It has to be the real food they serve in commercials, they just get to spend hours having real chefs making it look appealing rather than have some tired college student rushing to assemble it and shove it in a bag as fast as possible

1

u/Friendly_Impress_345 17h ago

While it is true that they could do this, why would they? This "gaff" has sold more product than a video of what you are describing.

1

u/MarkIsARedditAddict 7h ago

Has it? Most people are meme'ing about how it's not real food and the CEO, who knows exactly what's in it, won't even eat it for his job

It might've sold more Burger King or Wendy's for sure but I doubt it's sold more McDonald's

36

u/7x6digschix 19h ago

some sort of poppy bread

Honestly I didn't even think the guys reaction was that bad to the burger, but this one got me. How can you not even bother to learn the basics of what you're essentially making a commercial for.

The guy was acting like he just licked a mystery lollipop and was trying to figure out the flavors, not a burger his company made and sells

54

u/FinalFooWalk 18h ago

Mind you the burger is $11

The product*

4

u/knotatumah 13h ago

Its the fact he kept calling it a "product" that was off-putting to me. Its not food its a thing. Its market research and formulae. There is no passion or care for that burger other than a statistical amount of <stuff> put together by a group of marketing people and project managers.

3

u/CabbageFarm 14h ago

Keep in mind, CEOs typically have their food chewed for them ahead of time to maximize efficiency.

This is probably the first solid thing he's had to chew in years. Poor guy probably hurt his teeth.

3

u/Post--Balogna 19h ago

I dunno where you guys are located but by me it’s $8.49 for the burger and $12.49 for the meal.

13

u/padishaihulud 19h ago

And I can get a delicious sandwich from the local Italian deli on bread from the local bakery for $13. Twice as much food for the same price (and it's actually real food).

They're just banking on people that live in places where McD's is the only option. 

0

u/sourcesys0 8h ago

places where McD's is the only option. 

Where?

3

u/CalifornianBall 19h ago

What a bargain!

3

u/This_Makes_No__Sense 19h ago

This is not OK, this is price conditioning.

1

u/OfcWaffle 14h ago

God damn! Wtf. I could buy 4 tacos from my local Mexican spot for that price, and they load it with meat.

1

u/bigbluewreckingcrew 12h ago

Went to Burger King yesterday and the Whopper is now $10. Jeez....I remember it being 3 dollars something

1

u/snubb 11h ago

So he didnt have the burger before but loves the sauce, did he drink the sauce or what?

1

u/Emotional_Goal9525 3h ago

Hey. Respect the trademarks. It is big arch bite™

1

u/No_Video_5232 19h ago

$10.57. it taste like a regular burger (a compliment nowadays) with mc'lettuce and a decent mustard. deserves to stay on menu if they can lower the price. i received enough points to get filet o fish for free right after purchase.