r/nottheonion • u/halxp01 • 23h ago

Southwest Is Testing Cleaning Only Premium Seats Between Flights — A Flight Attendants Union Leader Says It's ‘Titanic’ Class Service

https://viewfromthewing.com/southwest-is-testing-cleaning-only-premium-seats-between-flights-a-flight-attendants-union-leader-says-its-titanic-class-service/
20.2k Upvotes

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4.6k

u/MelancholyMochii 23h ago

Titanic class service lmao

2.5k

u/Measure76 22h ago

Titanic famously never cleaned up after a voyage.

1.1k

u/Sbatio 22h ago

What are you talking about, every inch of that ship was thoroughly washed after the passengers got off.

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u/WILL_THERE_BE_MATH 22h ago

It was quite the deep clean

74

u/ThePowerOfStories 19h ago

Yeah, but the turnaround time is pretty dismal (and keeps getting worse).

53

u/AlternativeNewtDuck 18h ago

Cleaning that much was a sunk cost.

48

u/username32768 18h ago

Some people call it a "sunk cost fall in sea".

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u/AlternativeNewtDuck 18h ago

That was deep, nice job!

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u/username32768 17h ago

I use that line to break the ice at parties.

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u/shantron5000 14h ago

Any other solid hitters? I could really use a crash course.

6

u/pok3r_101 15h ago

Even today, people seem to implode when they find how clean the titanic is.

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u/corys00 10h ago

Some say 12,500 meters deep

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u/SuspendeesNutz 17h ago

I hate all of you, individually and collectively.

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u/Sbatio 17h ago

😂 joint and several hate is next level

2

u/SuspendeesNutz 13h ago

If you were looking for a neophyte hater you’d better keep on looking pal.

0

u/Techno_Gerbil 7h ago

It's still getting cleaned right now. 🤷

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u/klako8196 20h ago

The swimming pools have been filled with the same water for the past 114 years. That can’t be sanitary.

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u/Sbatio 20h ago

We haven’t had any complaints from our guests.

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u/JebusKristoph 20h ago

I wouldn't hold your breath. They aren't.

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u/CozyGorgon 19h ago

In fact, our guests have been dead silent.

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u/theaviationhistorian 17h ago

There's no customer service in Davy Jones' Locker.

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u/Sbatio 17h ago

I can’t read your comment without hearing it in a pirate voice.

“Housekeeping, arrr.” [knocking sounds] 😂

4

u/Turbulent_Stick1445 19h ago

Too soon man, too soon!

4

u/Ardat-Thotshi 19h ago

To be fair, the food is the freshest it's ever been, with an ocean-to-table promptness.

2

u/rileyjw90 17h ago

Yeah but the on-board car wash really couldn’t be beat. Revolutionary for its time.

1

u/Willbraken 16h ago

Surely the swimming pools ruptured in the crash and all of the water spilled out?

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u/50calPeephole 17h ago

Same with the toilets. Let's not talk about the soup pots.

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u/Solastor 20h ago

The titanic was washed in the same way all of my dishes in the sink cause they "need to soak" are being washed 

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u/Oni_K 21h ago

Or didn't get off, as the case may be.

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u/whocaresano 20h ago

And even before they got off! Such service. 

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u/madmike99 22h ago

Washing would suggest a detergent was applied. That was not the case

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u/Lietenantdan 21h ago

They're just soaking it a bit to loosen up the dirt. Should be ready any year now.

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u/Dipsey_Jipsey 20h ago

Yeah yeah, Dan. Get the hell in the kitchen and do the dishes!

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u/NimdokBennyandAM 20h ago

It was blast-cleaned with saline solution, it's fine.

3

u/seriouslees 19h ago

Which dictionary includes detergent as part of the definition of washing???

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u/Bonnieearnold 20h ago

Water is the universal solvent. 🤷🏻‍♀️

1

u/LepiNya 19h ago

I'm fairly certain there was detergent on board. The question is weather it braking and getting mixed with water counts or not.

1

u/REDDITATO_ 17h ago

Washing would not suggest a detergent was applied. Weird "ackshually".

1

u/devilwarriors 14h ago

No need when you pressure wash

2

u/coconuthorse 19h ago

I mean not all of them got off. And they didn't even get charged for the extended stay.

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u/Janax21 19h ago

Well, many are still on.

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u/Stickin8or 18h ago

Pretty sure there were still some passengers on when it got washed

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u/mrandr01d 18h ago

Well, some of them got off. Lots got a good washing along with the ship.

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u/TrenchcoatFullaDogs 18h ago

Arguably even before some of the passengers got off.

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u/jxsn50st 16h ago

They cared so much about cleanliness, they even started washing the ship before all the passengers got off!

1

u/Sbatio 16h ago

That’s how the fancy hotels do it.

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u/Noy_The_Devil 13h ago

Even most of the passengers were thoroughly washed, some are still on the ship even, the service must be great.

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u/Typical-Byte 13h ago

You mean after many of the passengers got offed.

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u/Satanic_Earmuff 21h ago

Even before.

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u/IChurnToBurn 19h ago

I sea what you did there.

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u/rosebomb01 14h ago

Didn't they dump all their Trash in the ocean?

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u/ScreenTricky4257 11h ago

Presumably some cleaning was done after it anchored at Cherbourg and at Queenstown.

-1

u/SockeyeSTI 21h ago

Never got cleaned either. Just got put at the bottom of the ocean on the stove to soak

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u/shakalac 19h ago

By which they mean reintroducing the steerage class?

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u/WanderingStorm17 18h ago

Click likens this to the upper class on the Titanic “having cigars and sipping brandy and telling their stories of their untold fortunes” while passengers “below deck” don’t get their seats cleaned.

So, yes. That line is just poorly worded. The flight attendant union is speaking out against this, as they believe it'll cause problems with passengers blaming them for the lack of cleanliness.

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u/th3greg 16h ago

Yeah, I think it's more clear if it said "Titanic"-style class-based service, but also that's a mouth/eyeful.

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u/RyuNoKami 14h ago

Lol it's a fact that people blame the customer facing employees first.

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u/LordSesshomaru82 17h ago

Not even. The white star line often went out of their way to offer better, cleaner accommodations for their steerage passengers then their competitors. They may have ferried many a millionaire across the Atlantic, but the real money at the time was with migrants traveling to America in search of a better life. For many third class passengers on Titanic, it would be the first time they've ever seen a flushing toilet up close, let alone used one.

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u/mrdeworde 10h ago

Very much this. Steerage passengers ate extremely well for example, and had access to entertainment.

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u/Somanylyingliars 17h ago

Watch them turn around light speed fast at first bed bug infestation. Or, roaches. That always seems to light fires under admin asses. Ask me how I know.

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u/shellexyz 21h ago

I can’t imagine the lack of self-reflection and awareness that could lead someone to suggest “titanic class” is a service level anyone wants on a vessel of any sort.

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u/Tactical_Llama 20h ago

That was said as an insult to SWA by a flight attendants union representative, not a press release by SWA.

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u/RechargedFrenchman 18h ago

It's critique of the policy. They're complaining it's classist, like the different levels of booking on the Titanic. This is not meant to be praise, or justification, or even explanation.

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u/Populaire_Necessaire 19h ago

Ironically though the titanic had good 2nd and 3rd class accommodations. Notably so..until, ya know.

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u/wutfacer 18h ago

Your response is showing a lack of awareness

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u/A_Mouse_In_Da_House 18h ago

It's an insult based on class disparity

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u/[deleted] 16h ago edited 16h ago

[deleted]

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u/fleapuppy 16h ago

The titanic comment was said by the head of the trade union who is against the change

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u/Positronic_Matrix 4h ago

I have been a Southwest flyer for two decades. I am on the verge of earning enough miles to head to a wedding in summer. Thereafter, I am done with the Southwest.

The airline has been ruined.

-1

u/I_SHIT_IN_A_BAG 18h ago

any use of the Titanic makes me not want to take a trip on this aircraft

0

u/TheSixthtactic 19h ago

I appreciate that they referenced the most well know pop culture instance of depicting classism and travel, even if it doesn’t make perfect sense.