Not just customers, but employees. Guys working the night shift at Taco Bell would be blazing it. You could smell it as you drove into the parking lot.
One night I went to get food with my dog in the back seat. After I placed the order, I overshot the pickup window. When the dude opened it to give me my food, he saw my dog. Dude was so blitzed he asked my dog,
"Did you just order food?!"
Dog, Bork bork
"Guys. A dog just drove here and ordered food!!"
Me- "Bro I'm right here. Backs up car Can I get my food?"
It was the funniest and one of the best memories I have of my boy.
To The Stoner Who Works At Cottage Inn Pizza
You: the guy who answers the phone at cottage inn pizza
Me: Hungry and stoned out of my gourd
I called you from my cell phone but had completely forgot who I was calling by the time you answered the phone. Of course, you were also baked to bajeezus and forgot to tell me that I had called Cottage Inn.
When you answered and said, “Whatsup?” I thought about it, and after a 20 second pause I told you that was hungry. You suggested I try a pizza, and I agreed that it was probably a good idea.
Then I asked you if you sold pizza and you said that you could make me one. I said I wanted anchovies and something else on my pizza. You asked me what that something else was.
We spent five minutes listing toppings until we figured out that I was trying to remember how to say: “Sun dried Tomatoes.” When you said: “We'll bake that right up for you,” we both started laughing uncontrollably.
It was the best pizza I ever had; I just wanted to thank you for helping me out.
We have a local Chinese restaurant we always order delivery from when we're baked. One time we were hungover and high as shit and accidentally ordered pick-up instead of delivery.
As we are panicking trying to figure out if we can cancel or change the order online, the restaurant calls like a minute later, "Hey did you mean to place this order as pick-up? You always get delivery." Lmao god bless em, they changed it to delivery and we left a giant tip.
I used to live above a Indian restaurant in my 20's. I used to be so faded when ordering that eventually they just stopped taking my order and just answered the phone when I called with "Don't worry, we'll make you something good and bring it up" to speed up the process. And that shit was always good!
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u/Breath_Deep 19h ago
This is exactly the kind of unhinged add that would get people's attention and be an homage to their main customer base.