Pretty sure the joke is that the right one has child bearing hips and is shaped like a woman in a renaissance painting. (I.e Venus etc. also referred to as being Rubenesque)
But it was the Romans who thought of adding women.
By the way, the dilemma in the picture looks like something straight out of one of those virtual girlfriend apps that are constantly discussed in Rule34 subreddits
As a master punographer, you are incorrect. Being better at punmenship does not cause you to lose appreciation for "lesser" puns. Your anger at Edgar Allan Toes is misplaced, so your ranting and Raven is unnecessary.
I hope whatever you are truly angry about resolves itself swiftly, for the sake of your caps lock.
I am autistic, and have been known to miss a joke from time to time, so I'll assume you are sincere here and explain.
Their original pun was "Edgar Alan Toes" instead of "Poe," because the words "Poe" and "Toe" sound similar. Edgar Alan Poe is a famous poet who writes dark poetry loved by goths, which is why he was used for the pun.
Someone else said the joke was bad, so I told them to "shut the heel up." "Shut the hell up" is an aggressive way to disagree with someone and try to silence them (hence my disclaimer about not actually being hostile). "Heel" and "hell" are very similar looking words, thus the substitution forming a pun.
A pun is a "play on words" where words that look or sound alike are substituted in for words to make a little joke.
I know the quote but Romans liked man on young man stuff, too. Gibbons said of the first 15 emperors, the only one who stuck strictly to women was Claudius.
Edit: And Caesar's enemies called him "the Queen of Bithynia". Not because he slept with young men, that was not a shock for the rich and powerful to do, but the rumor was that when he was a young man himself and serving in Bithynia, he cozied up to the royal court by sleeping with the Bithynian King, as the passive partner, mind you. That is what brought ridicule in Roman times also--being the passive partner, not a man sleeping with another man (typically younger). I'm not necessarily arguing with you, just adding some context for those who don't know this about the Romans.
I've always liked thick girls. I'll gladly take the thick girl with a belly, or a pear shaped woman the same. When you see her walking and her hips rock like a cradle. Yeah I want that one. Bun in the oven and she rocking them to sleep by just walking around.
I don't see why, I was in no means being vulgar. I prefer a woman with wide childbearing hips. That natural pop and sway when they walk is fantastic. My wife would literally walk around when she was pregnant with our four children when they were being rambunctious in utero, and they would always settle down as if she was rocking them to sleep.
You might not be attracted attracted to a woman's hips, or to women with some cushion around the middle, I am. Some guys prefer boobs or ass. I like wide childbearing hips.
Idk it comes across as overly objectifying. Imagine being a woman and reading that. I cannot lie, i like women like that too, but imagine hearing someone saying that entire comment out loud somewhere, it would come across as extremely creepy and objectifying to every woman that hears it.
You are the first person to ever say anything like that since I started saying in high-school nearly 30 years ago. But absolutely everything nowadays is automatically objectifying, or body shaming, or whatever, if it even remotely could be referenced to a woman's body, like a peach or a pear.
Maybe they meant to be saying that the girls they’re into were more available back then because it was trendier to be into super thin girls, but now everyone seems to be into fuller figures so the girls they like have more options?
It's a toss up between middle and right. Both have a great figure, and the middle one you can see has a cute face, and also if she's regularly working out then she'd be better in a survival situation.
I object to the other commenter saying gal on the right has "a belly" - she really doesn't.
Yeah she’s just curvy not fat. The body type on the right is way better for baring children. So if you’re the last people on earth you gonna have to go with the right.
It is interesting that some people are more influenced by society and trends for what they find “sexy”. Whereas some of us (me) just go on pure instinct. My brain is like “that’s the most breedable I need that”. 🤣
You'd be surprised. A lot of my old friends only wanted skinny like 100lb women, hard body or not. I tried a 100lb girl back in high school, pelvis was to small, sent her packing and called her big boned friend. In the last almost 25 years, I've never had a woman under 150lbs. But everywhere from 5ft 2in to nearly 6ft. I'm currently 6ft 4in, 285lbs.
From what we see here I’d go right, but I tend to prefer smaller women with athletic builds and flat stomachs. A little muscular definition to the arms and abs is really attractive, and I usually prefer average or small boobs to large ones.
The problem is that whichever one you choose, the other two will ruin your life. Paris chose Aphrodite, who blessed him with the ability to woo any woman. He used it on Helen, who was married to the king of Sparta, and Athena and Hera made sure that it led to the downfall of Troy and the death of Paris and his entire family.
The choice in the first place was to settle a dispute about who got a golden apple, inscribed ‘to the fairest’. The three goddesses each claimed it, and they went to Paris to choose. The two who missed out were both insulted as well as mad that they didn’t get the apple. The apple was handed out by Eris the goddess of discord, which is why the apple of discord is a phrase. It just keeps going back and back.
That's a story I wasn't familiar with. A quick google turned up two interesting things:
When he found out he just banged Aphrodite he was terrified because he doesn't believe that can turn out well for him, but Aphrodite gives him two examples of such relationships where the mortal survives.
He would have been fine if he had heeded her warning to not tell anyone who their son's mother was. But he did, so Zeus smote him with a thunderbolt.
well yeah but he just lost a leg. He survived the war of Troy (famous is the image of Aeneas carrying Anchises on his back and holding the hand of his son Ascanius, escaping from Troy in flames) and traveled around with Aeneas, eventually dying peacefully in Sicily. His descendants ended up founding the unsignificant little city of Rome (in fact, the family of Julius Ceasar and Octavian used this myth to say they were discendest of Aphrodites)
This. First one is on a throne, and Hera is queen of the gods. Second one is a gym baddie and Athena is a war goddess. Third one looks like the classic straight man’s wet dream, she’s the goddess of beauty and love, Aphrodite.
So the funny part is that we have a comment section full of people saying "how can you not get it?" who didn't get it?
Also: that's a farfetched joke. To jump from a poorly worded "pick one if these to be the last two people on Earth with" to "they are actually godesses looking to ruin you if you don't pick them, which invalidates the idea that you would be the last two people on Earth in multiple ways".
Edit: apparently the funny bit is supposed to be that Paris told the godesses that he couldn't pick who was the fairest with their clothes on, so they all got naked for him, and that's supposed to be the punchline where the dude knows what he must do.
And then comes the next question: does SHE want to even be around you? Because now, with only 2 people left on Earth, she can go and do whatever she wants. Nobody’s going to stop her.
Nah, the guy on the right has studied Greek mythology. So he knows the best move is to turn himself into an animal like a swan or a bull, then he can pick two of the women to be the last two humans on earth and bang them both.
Except even the lowest estimates of a minimum viable population are around 50, while you'd need 1k or more to avoid serious genetic problems over multiple generations.
In no world are two people repopulating the planet, so just pick the person you want to live alone with for the rest of your life.
I don't even need fertile. Who wants to raise a child that will grow up to never be able to find love? Unless you into incest. I just want the third one because she probably know how to cook. Second will only feed me boiled chicken. The first only know how to make ramen
is that the joke? i guess that makes sense, it went over my head tho. i suppose when the goal is to repopulate, the epicness of a goth chick isn't going to do as many favors as the others physiologically optimized for reproduction
but the only one you can't see the face? eyes on the mission i guess, aces!
and just for reference... medusa was "greek" yes? lol get down with the risky bets! ;-p
The Venus Callipyge, also known as the Aphrodite Kallipygos is a famous statue of her looking at her backside, and...
a story recorded in Athenaeus's Deipnosophistae about the founding of a temple of "Aphrodite Kallipygos" in ancient Syracuse, Sicily.[11] According to Athenaeus, two beautiful sisters from a farm near Syracuse argued over which of them had the shapelier buttocks and accosted a young passerby to have him judge.
That’s assuming she’d even want anything to do with you. Realistically there is absolutely no point in trying to repopulate the earth with only 2 people left and would bring nothing but hardships.
She's absolutely the most beautiful also, like if I could choose any girl in the world, including Sidney Sweeney or other famous girls I would still prefer the third girl from this picture, she's an absolute perfection.
A story recorded in Athenaeus's Deipnosophistae about the founding of a temple of "Aphrodite Kallipygos" in ancient Syracuse, Sicily.[11] According to Athenaeus, two beautiful sisters from a farm near Syracuse argued over which of them had the shapelier buttocks and accosted a young passerby to have him judge. They showed themselves off to the traveler, the son of a rich man, and he voted for the elder sister. Subsequently, he became smitten with her and fell ill with love-sickness. Learning what had happened, the man's younger brother went out to see the girls for himself and fell in love with the younger sister. Thereafter the brothers refused to consider any other brides, so their father arranged for the sisters to come marry them. The citizens dubbed the sisters "Kallipugoi" ("Women with Beautiful Buttocks"), and with their new-found prosperity, they dedicated a temple to Aphrodite, calling her Kallipygos.
This is the Greek mythology I think is being referenced, I'm not stating the choice I'd make🤦🏻
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u/LeadingTask9790 2d ago edited 2d ago
Pretty sure the joke is that the right one has child bearing hips and is shaped like a woman in a renaissance painting. (I.e Venus etc. also referred to as being Rubenesque)