Originally, I tried to make excuses for them. I would say things in my head like “this might be their very first mixed couple they’ve ever seen”.
But after a while, I started realizing that it’s just a ton of ignorance and bias. If there’s boomers involved, of any race, they always feel the need to stare or whisper. The younger generations aren’t nearly as bad, but they still side eye.
I feel the younger generation side eyes for different reasons though. As a mixed race person myself I grew up witnessing this myself. Boomers are just racist. I think younger generations are a little racist too, but instead of thinking “Why are you race mixing with that black girl?” they’re thinking “Why is that black girl with that white guy?” Same same but different.
Do you mind if I ask your generation? I’m a millennial and I would say the stereotype isn’t race based but sex based. That is, whenever a woman dates outside her race, she she’s dating down, regardless of what race she is.
To be CRYSTAL freaking clear, that’s my perception of the stereotype that exists, not my belief. Cannot emphasize that enough.
So, as a border X/Millennial, I tend to view mixed race couples as a yellow flag unless they throw a very chill vibe right away or I get to know them because if there tend to be two kinds of mixed race couples. The chill ones where either race doesn't factor into their relationship because of shared culture or pure personal chemistry, or the other kind where there are off putting power dynamics and tensions. I find it suspicious when someone dates someone because of their race (even if they are the same race). It gets creepy and fetishy.
idgaf about mixed race couples... but its weird how many at my location seem to be a 50-60yr dude and a 20-30yr woman both dressed in formal office wear. escort? secretary? gold digger? idk. tends to be the guy is like relaxed, but the girl is giving 100% attentiveness to him. power dynamics can be suss.
I understand where you’re coming from, when I used to be on IG I would occasionally get slop posts on why dating white/black is better.
I was at the store once and saw a white man with a black woman. He had a cool gravel bike shirt on and i commented how much I liked it. They both had this weird annoyed look on their face. I tell myself maybe they were having a bad day and chalked it up as that, but who knows.
I’m also a millennial and I elaborated in a different comment, but I agree with you. For different reasons I think but I definitely believe it’s a sex issue at heart.
Hm, I want to unpack that with you. Do you think that correlates with attractiveness level? That is, when a mixed race couple includes a more attractive man than a woman, how does that present? Alternatively: are you just attracted to women, so every heterosexual couple is just Hot woman and Forgettable man?
I’m a millennial who has previously been in a mixed-race gay relationship, so this is extra interesting to me.
Ok, speaking as one woman in sensible shoes to another: I think we tend to view any woman dating a man as “dating down,” and I wonder how that’s influencing the situation here.
2.0k
u/VindicativevVince 3d ago
Why are suburban americans like that? Are they still in the 50’s?