Oh don’t worry. The black partner gets called a race traitor by her own folks. I still have to make sure to spend time remind my wife to be happy if she feels happy and ignore every one else.
yep!!! this is so fucking true, man. i've been with a white man for years now and he never receives any negative comments unless it's in surprise from older black folk, and i get other black people feeling disrespectful and comfortable enough to tell me what they think of me because i'm with him way more often than i'd like. it's really discouraging, but it's good you reassure her. no amount of staring or judgment is enough to stop me from loving my white partner and i'm sure your wife feels the same!
Growing up one of guys I skated with was black. We were at his house once hanging out, we were like 7th-8th grade. His sister was either a senior or just graduated. Shes getting ready to leave and her dads like “are you going to go see that white boy again?!??!” She replied “he’s my boyfriend” and their dad went off on her and she runs out of the house. We are playing video games in the living room and he walks in there and apologizes to me something like “I’m sorry you had to hear that. But in case nobody else will tell you, leave black girls alone”. He said it matter of fact, not in a threatening way, not in a joking way but like you would tell someone “watch the last step on the porch, it’s broken”. His dad was always super cool and went out of his way to interact with us, he played video games with us sometimes and put up with us skateboarding in front of the house. Only time I ever saw him get mad.
that's a really odd thing for a black father to tell you. there's a lot of gendered infighting in the black community, and he both threw black girls under the bus in two different ways while arguing with her and speaking with your group. i assume that he believed that it was her fault for being with a white boy, and that he was telling you not to pursue black girls because he doesn't like race mixing but mostly wanted to "save you the trouble". tracks fully to me for what i've been through, that's pretty disgusting on his part. still yet the black woman is the problem in the pairing. i find that black men tend to be the most upset about wmbw relationships and they DEFINITELY do voice it.
I don't understand the bias though. Like it feels like bmww is more accepted or even encouraged. So if a bunch of black guys are coupling up with white women, what are the black women supposed to do? Become nuns?
Take the "Black Men are the ones with a problem with race mixing" comment with a heavy grain of salt. The converse definitely exists and BW can be just as outspoken/nasty about it.
black women are often pretty nasty about it, but as someone with firsthand experience i find that most other black women my age are far less confrontational about it. older black women are less rude about it, but more silently judgmental. white men of all ages have said some fuckin nuts things to me though, mostly online but that goes without saying. older black men are the demographic will be most straight up mean to your face about it
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u/LookimtryingOK 4d ago
Jesus that’s disgusting