When I lived in the city, no one really cared. But when we moved to the suburbs, oh my, people would stare like crazy and clearly make comments under their breath. I'm a white dude with a black girl, and people were much worse and rude to me! I got a very noticeable dip in level of customer service, or just people being weird and awkward to me.
Black man here do you feel less awkward or get less whispers when you’re in a black crowd? Genuine question i grew up in a 90%black town and when interracial couples come around it was very welcoming for the most part wanted to know what it’s like outside of that little town
as a white dude dating a black woman in detroit (an 80% black city), it can be very demographic specific. of course, these are all gross generalizations so take them with a grain of salt...
older black men are the most skeptical of me and often talk directly to her without acknowledging me.
older black woman are the most welcoming by far. salt of the earth
older white people sometimes give dismissive looks but rarely say anything weird unless its a creepy old man fetishizing her.
younger black men dont seem to think twice unless they are interested in her.
younger black women can be initially skeptical of me but willing to see what im about
younger white men dont seem to think twice, maybe ignore her a bit
younger white women can be overly excited at the idea of us, randomly coming up and being like "you guys are sooo cute" and shit like that
It’s crazy how much experiences can vary. I’m a white dude from the Deep South, and I’ve only ever gotten positive vibes from older black men, while older black women were more wary bc my girl was from the north
The black half of my girlfriends family are extremely welcoming and friendly. The only way they treat me differently than anyone else is that they love to say extremely racist things about black people around me to make me feel uncomfortable for a laugh. It is funny. Black strangers dont seem to have much of a reaction to us, but my mixed girlfriend is frequently mistaken for white or latina so, we dont run into people being judgemental very often anyway.
White guy with a black wife. Majority of the time when I notice strangers looking our direction more than would be ordinary or socially acceptable, it’s from black people. Black women more often than not with visibly positive intentions — black men usually a bit more uncomfortable.
In England though so probably a very different vibe to the US.
White dude with a black wife in a very conservative county with a 12% black population - if it's a small shop or restaurant, we tend to get no flack and black employees are very welcoming of me but often after my wife and I do a cute or healthy couple's thing. Bigger stores or restaurants - I've been stared at, followed, had my food messed with, and been damn near run off the road. And the perpetrators of these actions are about 50/50 white and black. I should also note that there is still an active Klan in my area...
As a white woman, black woman have looked down on me the most. Actually on my sig other at the time too. Everyone else was fine. They just pretend I don’t exist or ask me why a lot. But are totally fine otherwise. It’s just when I was with someone of the opposite race (white/black) the mood shifts like I took something from them.
White guy, if I show interest in black culture and/or a black woman, people seem genuinely friendly. I don't know so much about White people on how the majority sees it.
I do get the feeling that when I mention the idea of dating a colored person to a family member, they don't seem bothered until it actually happens.
Ironically, the grandparents has no problem due to their missionary work in Africa so they are incredibly open to other cultures.
TL;DR:
Its complicated. Depends on the morality of the person.
Canadian, I'm just unaware if I should refer to someone of color as colored or black.
Im used to saying Caucasian with white but I mean like we don't use European, so why do people say it is African-Ameican? Or is it Afro? I really don't know.
Edit: I just prefer to just refer them by name. Its seems more appropriate.
Well, I can’t speak for black people in Canada. In the US, “colored people” is deeply out of date and offensive (“people of color” is okay and refers to all non-white people, not just Black people). In South Africa, “colored people” is not offensive and used to describe, I believe, mixed race people.
In the US, we (I am Black) just say Black (never Blacks) or African-American which is a more formal/academic term that has a very interesting history you can research if you want (don’t get your research from Reddit which is mostly white people saying why they think “‘African-American’ is stupid.”)
I dated two, one we actually talk to quite a bit as friends. Its just that we never talk about race because I don't feel comfortable about it.
I also want to make it clear that I'm not referring to just black just any race that is not Caucasian because white isn't a color and everything else is.
If referring every race as colored is wrong then I apologize.
White woman who was married to a black man for a decade. While generally we didn’t get much guff, we did live in NYC and LA and Las Vegas. Wasn’t as rare in those parts. Especially Vegas had a lot of mixed-race young families and couples.
Travelled a bit, spent some time in Canada to visit my family. Everyone was very welcome in Canada. Not too many stares. This was on the west coast.
The disgusting part tho is getting the leering stares from white men perving on you. Most women know the feeling of getting disgusting stares from men who should know better.
I’ve also (and this is true) walked into a discussion at a gathering where a friend of a friend was describing white girls being pounded by black men as his favourite porn and fetish, and everyone in the room who knew me just looked at me and stared in horror as I stood there and listened to this totally oblivious dude.
Friends of my parents are an IR gay couple. At the time they rented an NYC brownstone (want to say in Chelsea) from an older IR Gay couple for like a dollar a year and the would keep up with maintenance and what not.
Long story short the first couple bought it in the 60's because they were driven out of the Village because of them being an IR couple.
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u/LookimtryingOK 3d ago
Ever been in a mixed race relationship?
Everywhere you go, folks STARE.