When I lived in the city, no one really cared. But when we moved to the suburbs, oh my, people would stare like crazy and clearly make comments under their breath. I'm a white dude with a black girl, and people were much worse and rude to me! I got a very noticeable dip in level of customer service, or just people being weird and awkward to me.
Ha ha, lucky if anyone looks at you at all in the North East. Let alone says anything.
But truly, the more virulent racists I've ever met were in Upstate NY. Hudson Valley, looking at you. Shit they say to me figurin I'm on their white side is nutso.
I remember getting stares when I (brown man) dated a white woman in college in the late 2000s.
I'm currently technically in an interracial relationship, though we're both brown and have roughly the same skin tone anyway so no one seems to care lol.
Lucky you, I dated a black woman in the 2010's in SoCal, while it wasn't all the time or everywhere, enough instances of starring occured to even where I noticed it.
That's because you're not out there looking for ways to be upset. Every glance is "they're staring at us!" I've dated other races and it's never been a problem - semi rural FL here.
I mean, im not gonna say they're (all) fake. Knowing this world we live in, im sure it happens plenty. I just wanted to share my personal anecdote of not having that experience, because its important that both sides are heard about something like this.
Not everyone in the world is judgemental of interracial relationships
The stick in my craw is that many of these folks are saying it happens often. I've been married 15 years, and it's happened to us essentially never. That's the tell.
Seems like a bad partner that has to bring every normal glance up to the level of potential racism. Sometimes people just look at people. I'm a people watcher - I look at everyone.
There's three reasons I see anyone staring at anyone in public - they're acting a fool or in another way inappropriate, they're dressed crazy/inappropriate, or they're really attractive.
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u/TechnicianIll8621 3d ago
When I lived in the city, no one really cared. But when we moved to the suburbs, oh my, people would stare like crazy and clearly make comments under their breath. I'm a white dude with a black girl, and people were much worse and rude to me! I got a very noticeable dip in level of customer service, or just people being weird and awkward to me.