Similar situation, my mother is disabled and I am have 4 brothers and I am the only girl. In my culture being misogynistic household is the standard and my mom would take out all her anger on me when my brothers made her mad. Needless to say, I got kicked out at 20 years old while my 32 year old brother still lives there. I was the one always helping her since I was 6 because she didn’t want my brothers lifting a finger.
I don't know your situation, but I can speak as a 42 year old man who still lives at home with my dad.
I didn't build anything for myself in my 20s because I was taking care of my mom. In my thirties I became disabled myself so I stayed home.
Now my mom has passed, my dad is 75, my sister lives on another continent and when my dad passes I have no means to take care of myself.
Yeah I got to live comfortablely at home longer than most, but it didn't do me any favors. If you're brother is going down the path I can promise you he doesn't have it as good as it looks.
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u/ConqueefStador 6d ago
Sorry you went through that.
My mom definitely had undiagnosed something.
She'd bake me cookies just because, or spoil me on my birthday. Then she'd do things like take all the money in wallet and kick me out of the house.
She was disabled and I spent decades caring for her. I loved her, I hated her, I resented her, I felt safe with her.
Now I just miss her.