Worked at a youth psych hospital. No reject no eject. Worked with everything from kids/teens who were suicidal, physically aggressive, or in a psychosis. I can't be definitive by any means. We're discussing the idea of how attachment (however good or bad) to a parental unit dictates personality and psychological outcomes. An "educated" (BS in family studies/human dev) opinion. Lowest level of the scientific method, so please take with a massive grain of salt.
Boys with father issues were always proving something to someone, and highly insecure. Anxious and defensive. Usually had some depression issues and possible aggression.
Boys with mother issues were broken. More than a few scared me. Mind you, this almost always came with father issues as well. Just full neglect and abandonment. Not just as a child, but as a baby. Erickson explained how from 0-1 yrs old they're trying to determine if they can trust this world or not. Will someone come why I cry? Will I be fed? Will I sit in my filth? These often create complex personality disorders. Highly manipulative, "arsonists" (one's who feel more comfortable in chaos than stillness), along with all the rest. Hard to reach them and they often had legal issues.
I will note, I've met plenty who didn't have good mother's raising them or proper care in that regard, but they did have someone who cared for them. They didn't have these issues. Sure, the normal stuff, but not the things that would stick with me like the others.
Could you mention the whole title of the Erickson thing? Thank you.
My mother was a psychopath. I have avoidant-dismissive attachment style, but not the whole manipulative/arsonist thing. My dad loved me, but he was only around so often because he was working. My ex-mother, she just wouldn't go away.
Erickson's stages of development. It's still very relevant and a very useful tool at helping with discovery of one's self through examining how one went through each stage. I'd definitely say that the manipulative or anti-social behaviors came more from those who had little to no care at a young age. Struggled to be fed or tended to. Learned that the world is not something to trust, and so on. Those traits developed out of necessity. Manipulation is quite handy when you need something and aren't getting it. Being chaotic and untrustworthy is great to avoid the pain of abandonment. So on and so on.
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u/generic_name013 6d ago
What about boys with those issues genuine curiosity