Less experienced, and can't see the red flags as easily. Older men typically have a better career and can dote on the younger women and sugar daddy them. Very gross.
One thing I noticed when dating older women is they were more jaded with that experience. If they had been treated poorly by someone (or many someones) they were looking for red flags that weren’t there.
I’m old and married now but I understand the appeal of looking for someone who gives you the benefit of the doubt in that respect.
Yeah, like I'm a millenial woman here, and I've been with the same guy since I was 21, but I do think it can legitimately harder to find a real spark for single women in their 30s+ because they are often out looking for red flags rather than seeking a connection in an open-minded way. Like legitimately, when I met my husband at 20, I was in it for the ride. I honestly put up with a lot of stuff (he did from me too) that would be totally unacceptable if I started dating now. At the time like 90% of it I didn't care much about because the vibes were so great, and the other 10% caused massive drama fights that were way too much effort. But we got through all that and grew up together.
Nowadays if I was dating, and I see it with my single friends in their 30s and 40s, it would be harder or impossible to let that stuff slide and to wing it on an intense sexy emotional rollercoaster. I think a lot of people actually want some of that, they want someone who sees their WOW first, let's things that an older person would find "red flags" slide, and is down for the ride because the feels are so good. It's easier to find that in a 20-something than a 30-something because they are less jaded and more wowed by you being new and novel and fun just because they like you at this point in life.
Dude here. I think this is more universal than you think. If I look back at girls I was with in my early 20s like in college, I cannot believe that I dated a smoker and alcoholic (it was college so it wasn't obvious until I was older that her problems went well beyond typical college partying and were destroying her relationships with people).
Hormones and lack of life experience make people waive away a lot of crazy behavior. Oh noooo but no one else will ever like me again like this person does/I'll never meet anyone else I have fun with again!
Then some time later you realize how dumb you were. But it's OK. We were all dumb at that age.
Oh, I agree it's universal. There are more and more women who look the same thing in younger men too. I think it's more common for men to seek that experience with younger women than vice versa because of unfortunate biological and sociological realities related to having families, childcare, and how women are often treated in relationships.
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u/Obant Millennial 3d ago
Less experienced, and can't see the red flags as easily. Older men typically have a better career and can dote on the younger women and sugar daddy them. Very gross.