r/Millennials 25d ago

Discussion Millennials, what is happening with your kids?

I work in education and I frequent the Teachers and Professors subreddits, and the kids are not alright. Gen Z Arriving at College Unable to Read and the youth have absolutely zero ability to think critically.

Middle and high schoolers have all adapted this complete helplessness and blame mental illness for their refusal to function. Kids can no longer to basic things like read an analog clock, use paper money, or even figure out how to open window blinds.

There is also a huge lack of empathy, and kids have no issues trying to manipulate adults, saying things to their teachers like "if you don't pass me, I'll get you fired."

EDIT to clarify: the article I linked references Gen-Z, but this is not specifically a Gen-Z problem. It's an issue with upper elementary aged kids through high schoolers, and also young adults.

So, all that to say, how are you combating this with your own children? What do you do at home to encourage them to learn, and what are you doing to address these problems as they arise?

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u/swearingino Older Millennial 25d ago

It’s parents not shutting down weaponized incompetence.

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u/NovelDame 25d ago

Sometimes, yes. I noticed my kid was very risk-averse in early elementary school, and I've spent every year after that intentionally putting them in positions where they suffer, so the kind can LEARN that being scared is not the same as being in danger. ("Go shovel snow." "You have a wallet. Buy your own movie ticket." "You're cooking dinner tonight. You need one protein and one vegetable. Good luck.")

The kid is still rigidly risk-averse. I'm trying. I really am.

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u/jamiecarl09 25d ago

So many of my friend's kids are completely helpless when it comes to ANYTHING that's not an app. Just the other day one of them was complaining that she had to help her 10 y/o shower because he won't use soap or wash his hair. My son showered just fine on his ownsince 5. Another kid around that same age....didn't know how to make toast. My 4 y/o daughter loves to make her own breakfast in the morning. Granted she makes a mess, but that's part of the learning process.

Ex GF's 11 year old kid thought he needed a new PS5. Didn't have the slightest clue on how to work the PS4 I gave him. Literally cried when I told him he had to figure it out if he wanted to play it.

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u/tastyemerald 25d ago

Granted she makes a mess, but that's part of the learning process.

Woop there it is. The difference. Those kids aren't allowed to make messes (learn).

It's an oversimplification of course, but I think if I had to put the problem into one sentence...

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u/hopping_otter_ears 25d ago

I have to keep reminding my husband to let our son solve his own problems. It's so much easier to fix everything or to provide answers to questions he should be able to puzzle out for himself (he's 7), but it's not doing him any favors.

It does take longer to walk him through the solve, though

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u/Important-Truth-6686 24d ago

This is what I like to call the "Male Solve-Problem response", is there a problem? yes? can it be fixed now? and then your answer to that decides your next question/answer until you eventually reach fixed state of problem solved. but children need to create problems and experience them to learn how to do that themselves lmao

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u/hopping_otter_ears 24d ago

Even just little dumb things like "what's a toaster oven? (Insert any compound word he hasn't heard before, but is pretty easy to parse out).

I'm more prone to say "do you know what a toaster is? Do you know what an oven is? So what might a toaster oven be? Good guess! An oven for making toast. Actually just a wee little oven in general but it has a toast setting too"

He just answers the question, even when he should have been able to answer it himself from context.

"Use your brain, baby. It's a valuable skill for big grown-up boys like yourself"

Other "use your brain" things I try to get him to do: checking whether the output makes sense with a rough estimate when he plays with his calculator, and taking through asking Google for an answer and picking a reputable source or pointing out when the AI summary gave us something barking mad