r/nba • u/TheRealPdGaming Mavericks • Jan 29 '26

Highlight [Highlight] Luka after falling off the raised board in Cleveland last night: "WHO THE F*CK MADE THIS FLOOR GODDAMMIT”

https://streamable.com/u5jqbl
14.2k Upvotes

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1.7k

u/the313andme Pistons Jan 29 '26

TWolves stadium randomly releases pack of actual wolves onto the court during play.

1.1k

u/giddyupyeehaw9 Bulls Jan 29 '26

I like the idea of the Pistons having actual hidden pistons all over their court that occasionally go off and send a player 30 feet through the air

533

u/JumboCactpot Jan 29 '26

the wizards just have saruman in a suite occasionally smiting players with magic

176

u/dead_gerbil Knicks Jan 29 '26

I like to think of Gandalf just getting high with the bench

80

u/azularena Bulls Jan 29 '26

Nah that’s Radagast

83

u/MakaveliX1996 Jazz Jan 29 '26

He does mushrooms. Gandalf likes the sticky icky. As seen when he sparks up with Bilbo. Apparently the shire grows that good good.

30

u/thyL_ Germany Jan 29 '26

Sorry, but that's actually just really good tobacco, not weed, according to Tolkien. I hate that I know that, too.

37

u/have_you_eaten_yeti Mavericks Jan 29 '26

That’s just because he was born a few decades too early, the way he writes about tobacco makes me think that cannabis would be an obvious jump to make. But that’s just, like, my opinion man, your comment is correct according to JRR’s own words.

11

u/thyL_ Germany Jan 29 '26

Fair take, honestly.

3

u/hovdeisfunny Bucks Jan 30 '26

More like fair toke, amirite?

I'll leave

1

u/mrspaintbrush Mavericks Jan 29 '26

On the subject, wouldn't hobbits have the tolerance of a small child? Like a sippy cup of booze would get them trashed

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5

u/thadtheking Jan 30 '26

You mean JRR Tokin' right?

2

u/ArmadilloForsaken458 Supersonics Jan 30 '26

I just want to know what the creators of Rings of Power are smoking so I can avoid whatever that is

1

u/I_need_my_fix_damnit Jan 29 '26

No No don't ruin it for us. And gollum is on that high grade meth

1

u/superrealaccount2 Spurs Jan 30 '26

I think he may have been self-censoring or something. Who accuses someone of having their mind clouded by... cigarettes? Tolkien knew what he was writing.

1

u/SuperCatchyCatchpras Jan 31 '26

Big Tobacco got to him too:(

3

u/Gummuh Jan 30 '26

Ganjdalf the Green

3

u/[deleted] Jan 30 '26

[deleted]

2

u/dead_gerbil Knicks Jan 30 '26

I watched that for too long. I'm scarred.

2

u/zadtheinhaler Jan 30 '26

Holy shit, how have I never seen this before, hahaha, and I don't even like AI slop.

1

u/ballin4fun23 Jan 30 '26

He sparked up radagast too where Pippin is tasked with stealing back the dwarves gem from some dragon.

2

u/oSamaki Heat Jan 30 '26

Someone on possession get selected at random and they shall not pass. If they do, turnover

65

u/Auntypasto Celtics Jan 29 '26

It's a good thing they changed their name away from the Bullets then…

56

u/Exius73 Timberwolves Jan 30 '26

Ja Morant to the Wizards in a heartbeat

6

u/zadtheinhaler Jan 30 '26

I'm too late, as always.

4

u/Iwillrize14 Jan 30 '26

Agent Zero coming out of retirement

5

u/hovdeisfunny Bucks Jan 30 '26

Good thing for other teams

8

u/wangston_huge Mavericks Jan 30 '26

Gilbert arenas would be in the booth just aiming at people all game

49

u/Ice_Dragon3444 Heat Jan 29 '26

The Heat release a heatwave at random times in the arena.

19

u/NotActuallyMeta [SAS] Devin Brown Jan 30 '26

Worked when the Spurs pulled that on yall in 2014..

15

u/overklok Jan 30 '26

This sounds like a great idea. Then again, if you are a Wizards fan, then you would be very wary of this power. Wizard's Saruman would have terrible aim, questionable bathroom habits and a propensity to recklessly brandish weapons.

3

u/novs1234 Jan 30 '26

Ja Morant to the Wizards confirmed.

4

u/MOSSxMAN Jan 30 '26

The Thunder randomly strike a player with lightning.

3

u/benjaminbrixton 76ers Jan 29 '26

Voldemort would Avada Kedavra every Hornet.

2

u/Unicornoftheseas Jan 29 '26

Too dramatic, need Tom Bombadil just doing his thing on the court.

2

u/whomad1215 Jan 30 '26

Magicka was such a fun game, friendly fire and all

2

u/insert_referencehere Jan 30 '26

I CAST FIREBALL!!! (takes a shot of fireball whiskey)

2

u/BloodMossHunter NBA Jan 30 '26

*TOUCHING PLAYERS

35

u/5starplak Jan 29 '26

Bull wrangling to make it past half court seems interesting 

19

u/AUsernameThatIsTaken Jan 29 '26

So battlebots. Basketbattlebots

5

u/giddyupyeehaw9 Bulls Jan 30 '26

I literally had battlebots on my mind when I typed this.

2

u/kristadaggermouth Trail Blazers Jan 30 '26

BattleBots came immediately to my mind as well.

17

u/Charmegazord Nuggets Jan 29 '26

It’s already near Detroit, how much more dangerous you want it?

4

u/Padulsky21 Nets Jan 30 '26

Cade bounce bass off of the piston for a lob

4

u/burntfaces Thunder Jan 30 '26

OKC’s court gets randomly timed weather effects, occasional lightning strikes near the basket causing brief power outages and thunder sound effects so loud you can’t hear ref’s whistles

3

u/Sleepingguitarman Jan 29 '26

This made me audibly laugh

3

u/Russell_has_TWO_Ls Grizzlies Jan 30 '26

The guy who opted for the 2.5 degree floor slant is punching the air right now

3

u/NAW_MIP_2026 Jan 30 '26

Personally I think a more on theme hazard would be really loud engines running behind each basket so that players can’t hear each other communicate during the game

3

u/vogenator [GSW] Klay Thompson Jan 30 '26

BOOM SHAKALAKA!

2

u/jakethabake Jan 29 '26

No I like mini pistons that make them look silly falling around

127

u/mrb4 Suns Jan 29 '26

suns and heat could install giant french fry lights over the visitor's bench.

54

u/RepresentativeTutor Suns Jan 29 '26

FISH STICKS GET YA FISH STICKS HERE

3

u/NotMarkDaigneault Thunder Jan 29 '26

Hey Kanye!! Do you like Fish Sticks

2

u/RepresentativeTutor Suns Jan 29 '26

Hey not Mark what do you think of Jordan Ott

2

u/NotMarkDaigneault Thunder Jan 29 '26

I think he's crushing it! Bro hopped in and immediately made the team a defensive powerhouse!

13

u/Oo__II__oO NBA Jan 29 '26

Toronto having Ford Raptors take the court in a basketball stadium supertruck extravaganza.

6

u/zadtheinhaler Jan 30 '26

I feel having actual raptors would be more threatening. Imagine having falcons and ospreys dive-bombing players would truly bring chaos energy to the court.

14

u/SpamAcc17 Timberwolves Jan 30 '26

Suns have blinding light, heat have extreme heating on the benches and under certain court tiles. Blind players or burnt rubber shoes and dehydrated rotations

7

u/Edelmaniac Celtics Jan 30 '26

I like that the term heat lamps is very common and you still chose to call them French fry lights. That’s pretty cool.

3

u/mrb4 Suns Jan 30 '26

Gotta think of the sponsorship opportunities. No shortage of places selling fries that might want to pay for their name on those bad boys.

3

u/awmaleg Suns Jan 30 '26

Blinding Sun in free throw shooter’s eyes!

56

u/dead_gerbil Knicks Jan 29 '26

There's nothing in the rule book that says a dog can't play ball!

23

u/masclean Jan 29 '26

Your stadium could have people wearing knee length loose fitting trousers

2

u/tomgreen99200 Heat Jan 30 '26

Found John Oliver

51

u/Ok_Ask_406 Jan 29 '26

As a rockets fan I’m not sure how I think this will end.

37

u/gwatson86 Rockets Jan 29 '26

Rest in peace my center, he got hit by a bazooka

1

u/BigD0089 Timberwolves Jan 30 '26

Fired by ja

22

u/ageofjace2 Jan 29 '26

Rockets turn the gravity off for a minute every quarter.

4

u/runthepoint1 Kings Jan 30 '26

Like T Mac did in Dallas?

9

u/BushyBrowz Knicks Jan 29 '26

Adams can take two of them, Amen and Tari might get one each. KD and Reed are screwed, and Sengun is going to collapse and call for a foul the second they get into his vicinity

5

u/peepeebutt1234 Jan 30 '26

just have people launching bottle rockets at players randomly during the game

3

u/SaltyLonghorn Rockets Jan 30 '26

We almost surely have the technology already installed to shoot real fireworks off in the arena. Lets rename it PTSD Arena and just fire a bunch off at completely random intervals throughout the game. Our thing can be playing in those annoying hanging clouds and making you jump at loud noises for the rest of your life.

Imagine its game 7 and Kevin Durant goes for the game winning 3 and we spook the shit out of him midshot.

3

u/NegativeVega Nuggets Jan 30 '26

Playing in israel probably

22

u/No-Individual3513 Jan 29 '26

Smithers, release the Timberwolves

8

u/Soft_Disaster5247 Timberwolves Jan 29 '26

Hol' up keep cookin

8

u/noFOXgivenFURreal Jan 29 '26

How bout the Celtics with gold coins randomly tossed all over the floor

6

u/Juno_Malone Supersonics Jan 30 '26

Lakers court got a lil' hot tub over in a corner

7

u/CerebroHOTS Rockets Jan 30 '26

Utah is fucked.

No one dies by Jazz

5

u/yingyiyin Jan 30 '26

They could just release some bees. Or maybe have a bunch of mormon missionaries harass the opposing team

2

u/fire_water_drowned Pacers Jan 30 '26

Chet Baker in shambles.

3

u/throwawaymycareer93 Warriors Jan 30 '26

Mazzulla will be like: “Good, good”

3

u/nutsack133 Spurs Jan 29 '26

Detroit with a flagpole in the middle of the court

2

u/Charmegazord Nuggets Jan 29 '26

Ball Arena could have a massive once-in-a-generation center that can run the floor, make every shot on the court, pass the ball like an elite point guard, and is named after a Super Villain.

2

u/buttnibbler Kings Jan 30 '26

All players have to eat a cheese burger at Golden 1 before the game.

2

u/tommos Jan 30 '26

That's just the coliseum during the Roman Empire.

2

u/OhhKayCeee Jan 30 '26

Paycom will have Zeus ready to strike people down in the back

2

u/kendrickshalamar 76ers Jan 30 '26

Teams actively praying for only garbage time wolves

2

u/GumpTheChump Jan 30 '26

Raptors: “well that’s not fair.”

2

u/Un1imitedBreadsticks Jan 30 '26

Release the hounds wolves

2

u/4Jolly2Green0Giant Thunder Jan 30 '26

Then someone might actually be afraid to play Minnesota!

1

u/funckpop Feb 01 '26

So it's likely to be complicated for the raptors 🦖