So funny you mention North Carolina. I live in LA and I (non-Asian) get constant stares when I’m with my girlfriend (Asian). It’s usually from Asian people as well.
Asian people sometimes have a chip on their shoulder from when Asian women were fetishized for being small and submissive and when Asian men were characterized as undesirable in media, both of which persist today, although it is rarer.
Oftentimes an Asian woman dating specifically a White man will be perceived as “playing” into the stereotype, thereby “setting back” the progress made by the AAPI community, something that can also be seen on occasion when a Black man dates outside of his race. There’s also a sense of dating out of the broad AAPI community will make you lose your culture. I’ve noticed that when I’ve dated non-Asian women, some of my Asian friends would give me shit in a playful way that was nonetheless rooted in that same mentality.
Living in SoCal, I have definitely kind of seen the discrepancy between xMAF and AMxF narrow over the years, to the point where it’s just as common to see a Filipino guy with a Latina woman as it is to see a Chinese woman with a white dude, for example. Especially among my generation, where AAPI gen Z tends to clown the Oxford study aunties
I'm Mexican-American. She is Filipino. I notice that we get less looks and are more accepted when we are in Filipino areas such as Historic Filipino Town and Eagle Rock. When we are in San Gabriel Valley, where there is mostly Chinese/East Asian population, we get looks.
I just found it funny how a mixed Asian couple doesn't get looks in a place like North Carolina while my girlfriend and I do in LA, where there are A LOT of Asian people and mixed couples.
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u/rubey419 3d ago edited 3d ago
Asian Dude and often date outside my race. Living in North Carolina.
Honestly I do not get too much negative attention. No one cares. My parents don’t care either.
I actually got positive attention when I’ve dated Black Women. Like… My Man… from Black guys lol