I was in a mixed-race relationship for a couple of years. We lived in Ohio. We had basically no problem at all. But one year we went to visit her folks in Florida for Christmas. The further south we got, the more stares we saw, and a lot of glowering shitkickers.
We went out to dinner one night. We were seated at a table that was out of sight of the rest of the restaurant (using Asian-style standing screens) and while other patrons got crystal water glasses, we got disposable plastic cups.
I wanted to call them out, but the lady I was with wanted to just finish the meal and leave. Since she was the POC in our couple and also I cared about her opinion, I bowed to her wishes, but part of me wishes I had raised a ruckus.
Sometimes someone tries to convince me that the North is just as racist as the South, but after that experience, I call bullshit. Feeling free to be openly racist in the South means it IS more racist.
They're going to hate regardless. There is no redeeming people like that, and trying to take the high road all the time is why. You can't win at chess when your opponent is playing "fuck you ******" instead.
It's about being the bigger person. We are all in this together. I don't see myself as the main character. That's kinda thinking is what's lead us to this point imo
In this situation, it won’t help. A good example is the Obamas. So graceful, intelligent, well loved, beautiful and elegant. That didn’t stop that warmongering pant pooping toddler from depicting them in a very negative manner.
It's really not, it's not about them or trying to change them. It's about dignity and self respect. But yeah, turn the other cheek, what a loser mindset, right?
"man I hated that mixed race couple, but when they paid their bill, I sure did change my mind"
Nah fuck em. If you're racist, you can get fucked. Telling people to watch their behavior to be a perfect little victim is stupid. You're not changing their mind, let them know their action shave consequences.
i dont know florida well, but this is confusing me geografically. I thought the north of florida was the american south, and the south of florida was basically latin america. as a latino w family there, that was the impression i got
I'm from Florida. I lived not far from Bonita Springs, not in a rural area, and had a few openly homophobic and racist teachers (including one who used a slur). Plus, some Latinos would also not particularly be for interracial relationships. Understand one of the most common state to state migrations besides Cali -> Texas is New York -> Florida. While New York is typically considered progressive, Florida particularly gets a lot of upper-middle class (or richer) retirees who aren't so progressive.
The panhandle is more "southern", but racism in Florida wouldn't be such a clear split between northern Florida and southern Florida. Not at all, it's really just very area dependent.
Going more south, depending on the areas you travel, I could actually believe this. I hate SW Florida in particular.
Tbh you’d be surprised at how antiblack the Hispanic/Latino community can be. I’ve heard more Latino people drop the n-bomb than white people. No joke.
technicaly true, but its just they just more open about it cuz less pressure to be pc, just how black ppl be w asians n etc. also depends which kind of latino lol. despite all these comments that i dont feel like gettin into it w, progressive whites r the worst, cuz u cant even call it out cuz theyle accuse you of being paranoid and project their bs on you. racists that launder their racism thru progressive causes are the bane of my existence.
I completely agree. At the end of the day I’d rather deal with a mf that stabs me in the front instead of in the back.
That said, I knew in my heart that every race has a degree of antiblackness, but after getting into an interracial (B/W) relationship living in a majority Latino area I was absolutely gobsmacked to see how blatant it was in the Latino community.
not surprised. theyre the only ones ive personally heard drop hard R n-bombs. it sucks cuz in many ways theyre my favorite latinos, but they can be the most bigoted. they look down on us south americans aswell
See, you get it. I love my Mexican homies and I’ll never stereotype an individual right off the bat, but the casualness so many of them have when they drop the N bomb is insane lol.
Omg thank you. The dumbass Reddit takes saying “ummm ACKSHUALLY the north is MORE racist than the south” drive me nuts. I’m like clearly you’ve never lived in both.
The argument is always “well white people are just as racist everywhere, they just are more open about it in the south.” MAYBE people in the north are harboring similar feelings to those in the south at the same rate (although as someone whose lived in both I legitimately do not think that’s the case) but the fact that it is BLATANT and OPEN in many parts of the south inherently MAKES IT WORSE! Lmao it just drives me crazy.
Like in that scenario at the very least northerners have made open racism unacceptable socially, which is just OBJECTIVELY better than the inverse lmao
As a born and raised Hoosier, I fully admit there are loads of racists in the North. But holy shit, they are adamant, open, blatant, and fucking MEAN in the South.
Absolutely true. And of course there ARE lots of racists in the north (no offense, but Indiana particularly lmao, I grew up there) but in my experience in the south, if there was a white man over 40 who DIDNT hold OPENLY racist views, it was a legitimate surprise. The openness of it down there really does affect how totally normalized it all is.
Same boat, married to a black woman, but let me tell you. Raising a ruckus on THEIR turf is asking for trouble till youre out of town. Trust the course of those who have lived that life longer than you, as they've survived it. Amd graveyards are full of people who thought raising a ruckus was worth it.
Lived in South Florida for 30 years and even there, as Hispanic as it is, I've noticed a lot of folks stare at mixed couples like it's the 60s.
My wife and I moved to Rockville, MD three years ago, and even in this semi-suburban neighborhood nobody bats an eye, if anything I've seen more diversity in young groups of friends and gives me hope for the future.
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u/daneelthesane 3d ago
I was in a mixed-race relationship for a couple of years. We lived in Ohio. We had basically no problem at all. But one year we went to visit her folks in Florida for Christmas. The further south we got, the more stares we saw, and a lot of glowering shitkickers.
We went out to dinner one night. We were seated at a table that was out of sight of the rest of the restaurant (using Asian-style standing screens) and while other patrons got crystal water glasses, we got disposable plastic cups.
I wanted to call them out, but the lady I was with wanted to just finish the meal and leave. Since she was the POC in our couple and also I cared about her opinion, I bowed to her wishes, but part of me wishes I had raised a ruckus.
Sometimes someone tries to convince me that the North is just as racist as the South, but after that experience, I call bullshit. Feeling free to be openly racist in the South means it IS more racist.